Friday, October 07, 2005

I probably began the day too tired, and it just slipped out from under me before I even tied my shoes. My negativity began to manifest itself in the slightly harsh retort I gave to one of my friendly art critics at the coffee shop. It was a joke, I know, when he asked if I'd plagiarized the pen and ink calf roper. He said he wasn't being serious, to which I replied, "How can I take that any way but seriously?" Not terse, not edgy, not with a scowl did I say those words, but with a directness that somehow withered him and instigated his request for forgiveness.

This little incident seems trivial, but it got right under my skin and smoldered in my heart like a thorn. I grew more anxious as I drove to my rehearsal with the Accompanist. By the time I tightened my bow, I felt pensive and feeble, and it became very difficult to perform. I couldn't stop feeling cold. As I stepped outside, every new scent of autumn decay pricked and tugged on my soul with associations of heavy grey memories. Tired and unmotivated, I ran my errands and withdrew to the confines of my home.

I spent the rest of the afternoon curled up under a half-finished quilt on my couch, waiting for suppertime.

I really fear I will become the person I hate the most.

5 Comments:

Blogger Shopper said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:02 PM  
Blogger Rod Pendergrass said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:02 PM  
Blogger puffintoad said...

Ha, You guys should know better than to use my blog for your own advertising. Not gonna fly.

10:12 PM  
Blogger CamoBunny said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:43 PM  
Blogger CamoBunny said...

under a half-finished quilt. sounds like when i curl up on my bed, under the covers, when there's a pile of clean but still unfolded laundry on top. i'm sorry you're feeling that way.

9:54 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home